I would go down on you faster than GM stock
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Randomize
