You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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