Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
this just has baby written all over it
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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