You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
