her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
How external is "for external use only"?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
