:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
