The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
only if we run a train.
done.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
