I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
