So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
