walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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