My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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