I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
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