I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize