so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize