I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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