I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
