dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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