My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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