She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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