Buhtt sex?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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