Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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