Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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