I just saw a hot homeless man
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
