You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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