Those balls look pretty dangerous.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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