READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I wish I only lived at night.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
