I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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