he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
