idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize