I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
