The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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