Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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