So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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