hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize