remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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