Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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