there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
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