She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
