Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
