so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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