we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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