it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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