The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Ladies don't puke and tell
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
