god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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