she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
