ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize