Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
