It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think my vagina is haunted
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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