So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize