what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
she told me i tasted like america
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
